Movie Endings

One thing that I’ve been mulling over for the past week has been film endings. Why are certain movie endings more popular than others? Sure, everybody likes a happy ending. But what about ambiguous endings? Twist endings? Endings so intricate, they take the viewer right back to the beginning?

Yet, the media emphasizes happy endings. People swoon over perfect love films and cheer when the hero defeats the villain. In other words, the audience loves when everyone gets exactly what they want. Except for me.

Why don't you like happy endings? I'm a just jackass like that.

I guess I’m the minority. I like unpredictable endings. I like to be shocked. I want the director to dangle me from a rope throughout the movie, only to let go once it’s over. These endings tend to be morbid, I know. But they are better than happy endings, and I want to tell you why.

1.      Characters tend to have more complexity. Take for example Twilight. Bella meets Edward and falls in love. The end. Nothing else happens in the movie that changes the main idea, so the two skip off sparkling into the sunset. But what if Bella had dumped Edward because of some self-inner turmoil? You’d be interested, right? “Why the hell did she do that?” you might ask, “does she still have feelings for him?” A flat character just became complex.   

2.      It’s not a re-run. Whenever my mom asks me to watch some romantic comedy with her, I cringe. Not at the thought of my mom – I love her dearly, but because I can only sit through so many recycled plots before I stick out my eyes with thumbtacks. It’s always boy meets girl. Boy and girl cannot be together (petty argument, money, one isn’t human). Issue is forgotten. Boy and girl cascade into a perfect life with no other problems. Try watching Cinderella on repeat for several hours, and you’ll see the similarities. 

3.     It’s hilarious. Non-happy endings are like fake haunted houses. You know what’s coming next, but you’re still startled. Surprise is fun. It’s entertaining to guess how the ending will play out. What isn’t exciting is watching a character’s life come together, seeing their perfect happiness, and then going back into an imperfect reality.       

Overall, I’ve had it will Hollywood’s movie formula. Seeing the peasant girl become a princess after winning over the prince was cute the first time. Now, I want her to take out an axe, chop him to smithereens, and ride into the sunset alone. Why? Because she’s complex that way.   

Favorite Kind of Movie Ending?
	Kill them all
	Happy
	Not too happy, not too sad
	Twisted
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Twilight

Synopsis: A teenage girl – Bella, falls in love with a vampire – Edward.

I have dreaded this day. I knew this day was coming for a while now. Today somebody told me, with a straight face, to watch Twilight. “Everyone has seen it,” she said, “that’s what your blog’s about, right? Movies everyone has seen.” Reluctantly, I nodded and told her I’d watch the movie.

It’s not that I personally have anything against Twilight; I’ve never seen it. It’s just how people have taken Twi-hating to the next level. It honestly can’t be that bad, can it?

For this review, I will try to find only the good things about this movie. Only the good things. Why? Because I’ve heard every criticism there is about this movie – from the anti-feminism of Bella to the ugliness of Edward’s face.  This movie needs some optimism and hopefully it won’t be that hard to find.

Good Things about Twilight:

1.       It’s romantic – if you’re into that sort of thing. Who doesn’t love teenage love? The hormones, the declarations of love, the secretly watching you while you sleep. At first, it sounds creepy – but as the movie rolls on viewers just have to go with it.

2.       Parents rejoice! This movie features abstinence. Sure, Bella’s boyfriend watches her while she sleeps. Just be thankful it’s not another movie about him trying to sleep with her.

3.       Werewolves and vampires are cool. This movie is like a child-appropriate version of Underworld. Next time I’m babysitting and want to watch Kate Beckinsale’s fully-leathered body mow down beasts with machine guns, I’ll pop this in instead. The parents will thank me.

4.        Characters don’t talk a lot. This is an easy paced movie. If you miss three minutes of it while making more popcorn – don’t worry, you didn’t miss anything. Probably just Bella and Edward staring at each other.

Whew, there it is. A positive list about Twilight. What do you think is the most redeeming quality of Twilight?

Forest Gump

Synopsis: From childhood to having a child of his own, Forrest Gump documents the fictional life of a character of the same name.

Forrest Gump, as a movie, had me out of control with laughter and tears. It broke my heart and pieced it together, only to break it all over again. Even though the director didn’t mimic some elements of the book it’s based off of, the movie was touching. It balanced comedy with drama perfectly. Plus, it made cliché life lessons interesting.

Preach it, Momma Gump

The scene that hit my tear ducts the hardest was when Jenny was lying in bed, sick from AIDS. She was asking Forrest about his life and said she wished she had been there, which Forrest said she already was. “Jenny’s going to die,” I whispered to my boyfriend, “if she dies fuck it. I can’t do this anymore.” Boom, next scene is Forrest talking to her gravestone. It was such an emotional performance from Tom Hanks that I was dry heaving into the pillow next to me. Dry heaving – as if I had one too many croissants at dinner. Below is a clip from that scene. Hopefully, I won’t have to sob over this alone.

To move on from the depressing, let’s talk about funny. Forrest getting shot in the ass. Forrest discovering the Watergate Scandal. “Run, Forrest, run.” This movie is the richest mine for comic gold. I could describe my favorite scene to you, but it’s a lot funnier to watch it yourself. Take a look:

Overall, Forrest Gump was magical. When it was over, I literally had to sit on the couch for seven minutes just to transport back to reality. Oftentimes, books make me feel this way – so it was encouraging to have the same “lost in the moment” experience on screen. This film has me thinking, maybe movies are like books after all. 

Forrest Gump Trailer

It’s trailer time again! I’m so excited to post about today’s trailer – I’ve heard great reviews for this movie. Here’s the trailer:

After watching the Forest Gump trailer, I have mixed feelings of whether I will like the movie or not. Typically, I avoid movies like Radio and this trailer looks similar to that movie. Radio was not a bad movie – it was wonderful, I just don’t like to watch movies that are “downers.” Life is already depressing; I don’t want to be even more depressed when the credits start rolling. The snippets of deep conversation played over dramatic music leads me to think I’m going to cry.

However, I could be completely wrong. When your lead actor is Tom Hanks, it’s hard for me to picture a serious movie. The scene where Forest meets the president and tells him “I gotta pee” made me chuckle. So did the Ping-Pong scene. Everyone always loves an intense Ping-Pong tournament – and I’m no exception.

Is it possible to have a comedic drama? I’m not sure, but it seems that the directors of Forest Gump sure did try. Which is why I am going to give this movie a chance. The trailer’s scenes look beautifully scripted and beautifully shot – I’d hate to miss out on a good movie just because I’m afraid of some tears.  

Now, it's your turn. For those who've seen Forrest Gump, should I watch it? Will those that haven't seen it yet consider seeing it? Tell me below!

Update

Happy One Week Birthday, Movie Smoothie! It’s hard to believe that I’ve been posting to this blog for a week. I can’t say faithfully posting every day has been easy. In fact – it’s been really hard, but well worth all of the effort.

For those of you who have been following from the beginning, here’s my list of the top movies that I’ve watched so far. The order isn’t based on anything other than my pure enjoyment of the films. I’m not judging based on actors, film techniques, or any other critique system professional critics use. Just my old-fashioned “that was a great movie” opinion.

1.     The Matrix

2.     V for Vendetta

3.     Wizard of Oz

4.     Titanic

5.     Star Wars

  

I feel almost guilty putting Star Wars last considering how great everyone claims it is, but it just couldn’t beat the Titanic. 

In other news, check out some other movie-related blogs. They’re manned by people more film-literate than I am, I promise. The links are below:

Horror Movie Marathon

Stanton's Horror TV Shows

The Trailer Park

Disclaimer: Unless otherwise noted, all pictures are my own screenshots from the movies – you can use them however the hell you want. All gifs are from Tumblr, but I can give you the URL to any of them if you can’t find it yourself or are too lazy to look. 

Best Movie Reviewed So Far?
	The Matrix
	Titanic
	V for Vendetta
	Star Wars
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Wizard of Oz

Synopsis: After a tornado sweeps farm girl – Dorothy, to a mysterious land, she must find her way back home.

Unsurprisingly, Hollywood is planning to remake The Wizard of Oz in 3D this year. Also unsurprising – I haven’t seen the original. Let’s fix that, shall we?

For those who are curious (or just want a refresher on what this movie is about), here’s the new trailer for the 3D version:

Now there’s a shocker. The new trailer looks exactly like the old one.

The Wizard of Oz was a strange movie for me to grasp. Part movie, part musical. For me, it seemed as if the characters couldn’t make up their minds whether to sing the plotline to tell it through dialogue. Many of the songs were useless, only to showcase information that the audience already knew. Take for example the “Follow the Yellow Brick Road” song. Extremely repetitive, or is it just me?

My favorite line of the whole movie goes to Glinda, the Good Witch. When Dorothy lands in Oz, she encounters this “bubbly” character. Bad joke, I know. But Glinda asks Dorothy if she’s “a good witch or a bad witch” and then follows Dorothy’s reply with “only bad witches are ugly.” I’m surprised Dorothy didn’t bitch slap the witch right there; Glinda basically implied that she can’t tell if Dorothy is good looking or not. Ouch. Check out the clip of the scene below:

By the middle of the movie, I was in love with the Wicked Witch. Her character created so much unnecessary chaos, which kept me interested in the movie. Showing up randomly to throw a fireball at the movie’s heroes? Golden. She could’ve easily took the slippers from Dorothy before she reached the Emerald City, but decided not to in the name of evil. Ladies and gents, that’s true dedication to one’s craft.

Overall, The Wizard of Oz was a great classic. I enjoyed the pointless song and dance numbers as well as what critics today would call “cheesy acting.”  

But I want to know what you think. How would you react to Glinda’s “bad witch” question?    

Star Wars: Episode IV A New Hope

Synopsis: A civil war between the Rebel Alliance and the Galactic Empire is underway. The Rebel leader, Princess Leia, is captured by the Empire and it is up to Luke and friends rescue her.

Before we get started on the review I would like to take a second to point out the miracle of absurd movie-making. This is the picture on the Star Wars DVD cover. Please take note of the half-dressed and totally ripped representation of Luke – outlined in red.

Now take a peek at how Luke actually looks in the movie:

 Something is not adding up here. On the cover, I was promised a hot intergalactic princess: Check. A dazed-looking robot in the right corner: Check. A masked super villain: Check. And lastly, a ripped guy to fight him: No check. Who the hell is this twerp? Blasphemy, I say. Give me my money back, George Lucas!

But on with the review…

“A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away…” ancient civilizations possess the power of space travel, but cannot store Death Star blueprints on anything other than a floppy disk. That’s what I took away from this movie. I ignored any positive message that Star Wars had to offer, and focused on how things could be different if they only stored the plans digitally. But that’s a movie made in the 70s for you.

Like my review of Titanic, my favorite scene in A New Hope was when Luke returned to find his home destroyed and his parents incinerated. In theory, the concept is terrible. No body wishes to see a character’s life be demolished in a movie. But I lost sympathy when I saw the two droids start to stack the charred bodies together as if they were playing a game of Jenga. That was hilariously disrespectful to Luke’s loss.

Unfortunately, I couldn’t take a screen grab portraying the shock I felt watching the droids move the charred bodies. But I did manage to find Star Wars action figures depicting Luke’s Aunt and Uncle’s bodies after they were incinerated – and I thought I was morbid. Here’s a picture of them, from Nerdlikeyou.com:

  

You can buy these babies on Ebay, and play Charred Human Jenga at home!

Your Favorite Thing About Star Wars?
	Charred Human Jenga!
	Princess Leia, the only girl in this universe
	Luke's totally ripped abs
	Floppy disks
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