The Matrix

Synopsis: An average computer hacker, Thomas Anderson, becomes the “Chosen One,” known as Neo, after leaving a simulation of reality. However, he must face off against his adversary – Agent Smith, in order to lead a rebellion against the machines.

Overall, I applaud The Matrix for giving its viewers a strong, female character – a la Trinity. The Wachowski Brothers outdid themselves making Trinity as prominent as her male counterparts. However, she didn’t have to look like one while she was kicking ass and taking names. I’m all for short hair (I once had a pixie), but they took away every feminine quality about her. By the end of the movie, she was diminished to Neo’s sidekick. No bueno, Matrix, no bueno.

Neo takes time to admire himself in the mirror

Aside from Neo x Trinity action, I noticed some sexual tension between Morpheus and Neo. And it wasn’t just me. At least 54 other Tumblrs agreed. Look at the evidence – directly from the movie:

Intimately sitting together

Stolen glances between the two

Hand holding

They say any good movie always involves a good love triangle. I couldn’t agree more.

Hands down, the funniest scene was when Neo goes to meet the Oracle. God, the whole time I was guffawing in my seat. Enter Neo, who sees a monk-child arranging a row of fucked up spoons on the floor. After watching the kid manipulate another spoon, Neo decides it would be a great idea to take a spoon from this weirdo. This begins a conversation of legendary proportions:

        Kid: Do not try and bend the spoon. That’s impossible. Instead, only try to realize the truth.

        Neo: What truth?

        Kid: There is no spoon.

              Neo: There is no spoon…

Oh my god, what? Monk Kid, the spoon exists! Neo is clearly holding the spoon. I don’t know what the hell you are talking about. But if my dear readers want to figure this out and tell me, here’s the clip of the whole scene:

 

Watched it? Good. Now we can move on before this kid ruptures my spleen from laughing so hard.

My other moment of “what the eff” stemmed from the security guard scene, only because I can never believe this would ever happen. If you take away the ever-so-appropriate dressed Neo from this picture, what’s left?

Top-Notch Security at its finest

Exactly – three out of four security guards doing a whole lot of nothing. I don’t know about you, but whenever I go through metal detectors and the alarm sounds – every MF in the building races towards me. Even the janitor puts down his mop to check my bag for bombs.

Apparently in Matrix land though, one guard is enough to check this shady, sunglasses-wearing charlatan. I call bull, Wachowski Brothers – you need at least 12 guards prodding Neo to be a realistic representation of American security.

For as much smack as I'm giving The Matrix, it was a fantastic movie. I didn't mind giving up two hours of reading time to watch it, which is equivalent of an alcoholic giving up a bottle of wine. 

But I want to know what you thought. Did you like The Matrix? Hate it? Wish there was more of Agent Smith? Because I sure did. Let me know below!